Way to Raise Your Kid to Be a Total Drag.


Little boy, watching teen girl smoking: Why are people always smoking cigarettes?Dad: Because they are addictive. That is why daddy quit. Do you want to tell the nice girl what will happen to her if she doesn’t quit?Little boy: Well, first you’ll get really sick. And then you’ll die. (pause) And then you’ll be dead! –15th St & 7th Ave Overheard by: Nora Claire...


Wednesday One-Liners, Now with Pop-Up Blocker


Trader: Yeah, so after I first called him I accidentally sent him a hardcore porn email, and he got such a kick out of it he sent me a hundred and fifty thousand share order. –42nd & Madison Overheard by: So that’s how he makes so much money Chick : Well, I got that thing on Facebook for his funeral, so I’ll be there Monday… –NJ Transit train to Penn Station Overheard by: Jingles Kid on cell: Okay...